Boldly Go Solo

How to set out solo, but not travel alone: Trips, tips and ideas for the active traveler.

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  • Hallelujah. More of the travel world is recognizing the solo traveler.

    The New York Times ran a story today called "One Is No Longer the Loneliest Number." It says that travel companies increasingly are "courting" solo travelers. The piece mentions companies such as Intrepid Travel, which is offering singles-only trips and Absolute Travel, an agency specializing in customized luxury trips that will begin a service pairing compatible travelers seeking travel partners. 

    These are not new concepts. I did a solo bike trip with Backroads a decade ago. And travel-partner matching services have come and gone over the years. But it’s nice to learn that more companies are aware of the existence of solo travelers and are offering them options.

    Still, I will reiterate some of my basic beliefs about solo travel:

        1. A trip purely for solo travelers is bound to have a "meet market" feel to it. It won’t be as dramatic as a night at a singles bar, but people WILL be scoping out the possibilities.
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  • Trip planning: Tapping friends. And friends of friends. And their friends. And the relatives of all those friends.

    You have friends, right? And they have friends? And relatives, too? Well, what are you waiting for? TAP THEM. You don’t have to know them well, or even at all. They just have to live someplace you want to go.

    That’s how I decided I could go to Ecuador without a travel companion. The thought of landing alone after dark in Quito, the capital city, was nerve wracking otherwise. But my childhood friend’s husband’s uncle’s wife (don’t bother figuring it out) is Ecuadorian. So I asked Mark, whose aunt it is, to connect me with her.6blanca_cebring

    That’s how Lola ended up picking me up at the airport the night I arrived. We’d never talked during the planning stages. The whole thing had been arranged through emails and phone calls between her daughter in Miami and me. Lola drove me to her Quito condo but only stayed one night. She had to get back to the beach-front hotel she ran with her husband in Atacama.
       

    But she did leave me the keys to the place. I stayed there for several days before and after my travels, and met other family members. The condo came equipped with Blanca, the family maid and assistant, who speaks no English. She and I got pretty good at using smiles, nods and advanced charades to communicate.

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  • You can’t possibly predict where solo travel will take you

    The second time I went to Club Med, it led to international travel in three countries on two continents. No, not all in that same week.

    I used to like going on vacation to Club Meds because they’re easy. One phone call and you’re done. Not a lot of agonizing or planning. A plus if you don’t have anyone to plan with. And, the clubs make life easy for solo guests. Hosts seat you at tables with other people so you can mix and mingle. You meet people during sailing and windsurfing lessons, on the volleyball court, in exercise classes.

    I went to my first Club Med with a friend, during a week off from grad school. So I knew what to expect. We’d go to the amateur entertainment at night and afterwards dance, dance, dance. But you don’t have to. You can participate in a lot of activities. Or you can sit on the beach and veg.

    I have to admit, I went looking for single men. Instead, I met a great female friend. Women ALWAYS meet great women when they go to a singles event looking for men. Ask anyone. But that’s a story for another blog. In any case, Nicole was bubbly and gregarious and by midweek, she’d put together a group of about eight of us, six women and two men, who hung out on the beach, at meals and on the tennis court.

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  • Go take a hike…in exotic places, with like-minded people

    There are a thousand brochures in the naked city…  Unfortunately, I can’t possibly go on every trip that’s out there. But I can pass along ideas that come my way for you to check out. I recently learned a couple of things about the The Wayfarers. For one, National Geographic Adventures rated the company one of the 10 best hiking and walking companies in the world.

    And, it turns out, more than half the walkers who join their trips are solo travelers. I would still call to find out who’s going on your particular trip if you’re nervous, but the chances sound good that you won’t be traveling with all couples.Nz_second_set_010

    Finally, there’s the line in their "about us" section: "You’ll never walk alone." Okay, it’s a play on that schmaltzy song from Carousel, but as a solo traveler, I get their drift. They’re offering experienced guides and a set of companions for vacationers who enjoy meeting people while away. And really would rather not walk alone.

    Photo: Ellen Perlman 

  • Giddyap and go, Arizona horse ranch style

    Jackrabbits. Roadrunners. IBM executives who dropped out of the rat race to be trail guides. I found them all at horse ranches in Arizona. My first one was at Circle Z Ranch in Patagonia near the Mexican border. After reading about it in the New York Times travel section, I was sold. I booked a flight and rented a car.

    Chileargentina_054_2
    At Circle Z, I had a cottage for myself with two beds, wicker chairs and a desk, and Western magazines for my reading pleasure. Not to mention a welcoming fruit plate. I found friendly people to talk with at meals, where there was no such thing as a table for one. And mingled with them and others while saddling up and hitting the trails.

    A British couple I got to know over the week taught this city girl how to shoot pistols. They lined up some bottles on a fence and I managed to break a few. All in all, I would say a ranch is a pretty comfortable place to be for someone vacationing solo.

    One morning before breakfast at Circle Z, I took a walk along a dry river bed on ranch property. At some point I sensed movement in the woods. Then two horses emerged and starting walking toward me. I was frightened at first, what with no fences between us. I had remind myself that these were horses, not lions or tigers. But why were they coming at me so steadily?

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  • Campfires to Bond Around

    How do you find a trip that includes a campfire? (see previous post about the benefits of a campfire for solo travelers) Simple answer. Any trip with camping is bound to include a blaze. Nights are often chilly. And always dark. Perfect conditions, as I discovered on each of the following vacations:

    Sea_kayaking Sea kayaking and whale watching, the Inner Passage off Vancouver Island, Canada. Bonus: Our guides paddled out to a fishing boat to buy salmon, minutes after the catch had flopped on board. Then they cooked it over a lovely fire. Could a meal be any fresher? As if that weren’t enough, the sky treated us to a Northern Lights spectacular.

    Rafting on the Colorado, the Green, the Snake, the Yampa and other rivers out West. A campfire by a river is a singular pleasure. Especially a river you bathed in earlier in the day.

    Biking the Canadian Rockies from Banff to Jasper. The fire served as a lovely heater on those 40-degree nights.

    Photo: Ellen Perlman; The Inner Passage, Canada.

  • The Campfire Theory of Bonding

    I love sleeping in the great outdoors, but I don’t always relish how my body feels after a night on the ground. Thermarest or no. So the idea of hotels and inns can be mighty appealing.

    But there is at least one major bonus to campground trips. It’s the fire. 527824186_3d0d2a65f1_m
    There’s nothing quite like sitting around a roaring blaze with a group of people, just chillin’. (Or would that be "heatin’?"). You’re all together in one place. People are relaxed. There’s really nowhere to go.

    At inns, couples might retire to their rooms early. Or some people go to the bar, or walk into town. Then the group splits up. Around a fire, you often hear great stories and good jokes. Even the bad jokes are funny after enough wine. Or enough marshmallows. Preferably toasted a dark brown.

  • Good travel partner? Or security blanket, and a wet blanket at that?

    Virtually every traveler can tell a story about the trip gone bad because of problems with a travel partner. My friend Lauren was in her mid-20’s when she invited a "security blanket" friend. Just anyone, so long as she didn’t have to travel around Spain on her own.

    "X" was a good guy. Just not a good travel companion. They toured Madrid, Grenada, Cordova, Toledo and Seville, struggling to make it work. But their travel personalities just didn’t match. He wanted to see art. She wanted to go to street festivals. He could study a cathedral window for hours. She was bored after a short while. He wanted to spend money to eat well. She was fine with bread and cheese.

    "Why wasn’t I braver," she wonders. "I would have had a better time by myself." Lauren had done all the planning and organizing for the trip. She ended up doing all the driving in Spain as well. "I would have been perfect on my own."      

  • Wheee…skating through Amsterdam

    It was thrilling gliding through the streets of Amsterdam on a Friday night, joining a crowd of skaters who had taken over the streets. People out for an early evening stroll cheered from the sidewalks as the "skeelers," wearing blinking lights on their clothing, streaked past.

    Travelskatesuits
    I never would have had the chance to do this if I hadn't signed up with a group called Zephyr Adventures for an inline skate tour around the Netherlands. A few of my friends skate. But none love it enough to make a vacation out of it. And I don't think I would have been brave enough to join a crowd of skaters in a foreign country on my own. Who would pick me up if I fell?

    The owner, Allan Wright, clued us in about the "Friday Night Skate," an optional adventure we could do before or after our week-long trip. As if skating for miles around Friesland and other parts of the Netherlands weren't exciting enough. All of it was memorable, especially skating with Willem Augustin, an 80+-year-old guide known around the country for participating in several Elfstedentocht speed skating races, beginning during World War II. Having new friends to skate with at dusk, and to dust me off if need be, was an added bonus.

    Photos: Ellen Perlman
    Two locals dressed for skating

  • “Noah’s Ark is to Blame” for singles staying home

    More companies than ever are marketing to solo travelers. It’s nice to know they realize that not all people come in pairs. I received a press release today (as travel writers are wont to do) promoting Asia Transpacific Journeys that says, "Noah’s Ark is to blame" for people thinking they can’t do anything exotic without a significant other by their side. Now, I don’t want to hold Noah totally responsible, but if the boat fits…

    I haven’t traveled with this group yet, and can’t vouch for what they offer, but I agree with their contention that when you join a group trip, you automatically will have interests in common with the people you meet. Even if turns out only to be your mutual interest in Papua New Guinea, while you’re traveling together in Papau New Guinea. But it’s likely to be more than that.

    A group also provides a "layer of support and assistance" for all travelers, single or coupled up. And group travel often will get you to places you would not have found, or been willing to go, on your own.