Boldly Go Solo

How to set out solo, but not travel alone: Trips, tips and ideas for the active traveler.

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  • You, too, can become a Cochabambino for a little while

    Friends sometimes ask how I come up with my vacation ideas. It's magic! Nah.Power_of_chocolate_ellen_perlman

    Sometimes I'm inspired by one of the many press releases I get as a travel writer. I sense an immediate, "whoa, that's cool," reaction and I find a way to go. That's how I ended up in Barco de Avila, Spain, "teaching" English to Spaniards. See previous post.

    Sometimes I read a travel story in the paper and that's all it takes. After reading a blurb in The Washington Post about inline skating I just had to do it. See previous post.

    Chocolate_products_ellen_perlman_2
    Here's my latest daydream. See previous post on travel daydreaming… (okay, enough with the "previous posts.")

    I have a friend Daniel, from Bolivia. We met here in Washington when I advertised for a "language partner" on craigslist two years ago. I help him with his English and he helps me with my español. (Estoy mejorando.) We've become good friends.   

    One year he came to my family's Thanksgiving. It was
    nice for him to experience his first American Thanksgiving. And wonderful for us to have such a special guest. Everyone who could speak a few words of Spanish tried them out on him. He was most patient and gracious.

    Several
    times, he's invited me to go to Bolivia the next time he goes home to
    visit his family in Oruru. The first time he said it, I had to explain my
    response of "I'm so there. I've already booked my ticket!" (No, not
    really, I said when I saw his astonished face. It's just an expression.)

    Daniel
    hasn't gone home yet. So I still haven't been to Bolivia. But I
    continue to daydream about it. And lately, I've been thinking it might be
    an imposition to stay with his family for too long. It got me to
    thinking…

    I went online to look into Spanish lessons in
    Bolivia. Something I could do on my own, before or after a visit with his family. I knew that Daniel had gone to the university in Cochabamba
    (where residents are known as "Cochabambinos." Isn't that great?) I
    thought it would be nicer to study Spanish in a university town than in
    the middle of La Paz, the capital.

    I went online and put a few key words into Google and came up with a language program called "Languages in Action." They give Spanish lessons in 13 countries, including Bolivia.

    They offer a variety of accommodations ranging from
    living with a host family to sharing student housing to staying at a
    bed and breakfast. That's as far as I've gotten on my research.

    Maybe this thing about visiting Daniel's family won't work out. But it wouldn't surprise me if I ended in Cochabamba anyway, to practice Spanish for a week and live with a family. I already love the idea.

    Trip ideas and plans start with the basics. What do you love to do?
    Where have you always wanted to go? What have you always wanted to
    see/do? What did you recently read about in the paper that appealed to you?
    If you can't find a friend to go, would you do it anyway? (Say yes!) After that, you find a way to make it happen.

    Photo: Ellen Perlman.
    1.The closest I've gotten to Bolivia this month was talking with Vincent Fernandez Flores, a farmer who is part of El Ceibo, a Bolivian Cacao Cooperative. He's seen here holding a cacao seed pod. He was in Washington February 9 and 10, at the National Museum of the American Indian, for a cultural exhibit called, "The Power of Chocolate." Flores is Aymara, a native ethnic group in the Andes and Altiplano regions of South America.

    2.Some Spanish-language products made from the cooperative's cacao.

  • Traveling solo? Enlist the help of the online community

    Irene is going to be on her own in Rome for two days before going to Florence. For an Italian language course.

    (Hm, she didn’t happen to just finish reading "Eat, Pray, Love" by any chance? For the three of you who haven’t yet read that very popular book – among women, at least – it starts off with the story of a woman studying Italian in Italy. I salivated through the first third of the book as she described all the food she was eating.)

    So Irene does what any woman (or man) of the 00’s should do: she goes online to do research. She asks people at the Fodor’s Web site where are the best/safest places for a middle-aged woman to stay on her own in Rome. 

    From that posting, she got 13 responses from knowledgeable travelers, and made a choice based on their assistance. Her response to the people who shared their knowledge:

    Thank you to all the helpful people with great information. On the basis of your input I have decided to book at hotel Smeraldo…your generosity in answering my questions is much appreciated. If anyone ever wants to make the long trek out to Australia, and has questions, I would be happy to reciprocate."

    And you know she would too. That’s the kind of exchange that travelers are happy to engage in.

    As for Irene’s journey, she is taking my ideal kind of trip. She sets out solo and explores a new city on her own. If she starts to feel lonely, she knows that within a few days, she will meet a slew of people in her Italian classes. She likely will have company for dinner if she wants it, and people to do things with. Perfetto.

  • What the Buddha says about solo travel

    Buddha_2_thailand_ellen_perlman



    "Travel only with thy equals or thy betters; if there are none, travel alone."

    Dhammapada


    In the case of the Buddha, the concept of "travel" was much broader, I’m sure, than being a tourist. Nevertheless, the saying applies to the solo traveler just as well.


    Buddha_feet_ellen_perlman
    According to me.

    The sage blogger



    Photos: Ellen Perlman. Buddha in Thailand. Feet of the Buddha with offerings.

  • Couch surf or get hosted by someone in a “peace movement.” Either way, it’s a way to meet people while traveling solo.

    So this guy, Casey Fenton, buys a ticket to Iceland, but he doesn’t know anyone there. He dreads the thought of staying in an impersonal hotel and playing tourist all weekend. So, he does what anyone…scratch that…no one else would think to do. Icelandic_geyser_steaming_after_it_

    He emails more than 1,500 Icelandic students in Reykjavik, the capital, asking if he can crash on someone’s couch. And it actually works. Several groups of friends – strangers to him – offer to show him "their" Reykjavik.

    How do I know about this? I read it under the frequently asked questions on couchsurfing, the Web site that developed out of Fenton’s Iceland weekend. Yes, now you, too, can couch surf. By visiting the site and signing up. Then visiting couches all over the world.

    Pretty kooky/great concept. I don’t know if I’d do it necessarily. Maybe. But if I were 22 again it’s likely I would.  Back then, I did a lot safety-be-damned kind of things that never turned out badly.

    During six weeks
    of hitchhiking with a friend from the Netherlands to Norway – nope, wouldn’t do that solo – we  ended up staying overnight in lots of
    strangers’ homes. 

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  • Bed and breakfasts could trump fancy hotels for solo travelers

    Niagara_falls_canada_side_ellen_p_3
    Reading about tonight’s total eclipse of the moon reminded me of an assignment I had several years ago. It was during the Leonid Meteor Shower of 2001.

    I was in Niagara Falls doing a story for The Washington Post. At some ungodly hour, I dragged my sorry self out of a hotel bed. I wanted to catch a glimpse of what was supposed to be a spectacular light show. Coat over jammies, I got into my car and drove away from the city lights.

    The sky was sodden with clouds. Not a star to be seen, let alone the fireworks of "falling stars" I would have experienced, if only I’d stayed home in clear-skied Washington. Oh well. Niagara_falls_american_side_ellen_p

    What it made me think of today was how alone I felt on that Canada trip. I experienced the power and the glory of the falls from the American side one day and the Canadian side the next. I got so close to the mist it made my hair curl.

    All day long I reported the story. I talked to park rangers in New York. And viewed the gushing waters from underneath the falls in Canada. I drove up to Niagara-on-the-Lake and shopped in the cute little stores. I was content.

    Come nighttime, however, I was lonesome. I was in a beautiful hotel, paid for by the newspaper, but it was isolating. I went out to dinner at a nice, busy Italian restaurant. But I was bored. I hadn’t remembered to bring something to read.

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  • Solo travelers are regular people. The only difference is they book for one.

    One of my biggest beefs is how the world views solo travelers.  As if we’re some kind of oddity, or people to be pitied. This is the opening sentence of a story by the Reuters news agency:

    "No one to go on vacation with or escaping a broken heart? That’s no reason not to travel."

    Give me a break. I excuse this pitiful story lead only because it was around Valentine’s Day and someone thought he/she was writing a clever tie-in to the "holiday."

    As I’ve said before, I often purposely travel solo because the experience is that much richer. Instead of gabbing with a friend, I’m observing the world around me. If I’m on an active vacation, I’m meeting new and interesting people.

    I don’t want to bring home with me. I don’t want to have to deal with the quirks of my friends when I’m supposed to be relaxing. And sometimes, I’d prefer that what happens on my vacations stays on my vacations, as far as the gossip chain in my regular life goes.

    What I found oddest of all about the story was the top-10 list that Reuters referred to. It was created by IgoUgo, a website owned by Travelocity that’s full of reader recommendations.

    Number one on the list is Vienna. This is what the says:

    "Each spring for the past few years, I’ve indulged in a solo trip to Europe, usually prompted by some long-standing fantasy I’ve had. One year I tramped around Dartmoor; another found me footloose in London. But this year’s trip was one I’d dreamt about for decades: to Vienna, to sample its mind-boggling array of concerts and operas."

    That’s it. 

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  • When traveling, strike up a conversation whenever possible

    If I'm ever in Chile and need a place to stay, I am welcome to stay with Mauricio. He just emailed me the other day extending the invitation. That made me really happy. Even if I never go. Ellen_and_paola_holding_up_segovias

    I met Mauricio and his sister, Paola, in Spain last June. On a train ride from Madrid to Segovia. I was dozing, my face smushed against the train window. Very attractive, I'm sure.

    I sensed that some people had joined me, one on the seat opposite me, the other next to me. I was too tired to pay much attention, except to wonder why they didn't sit together. Then I was back to zzzzzz's.

    At some point, I heard one ask the other, "When do you use 'maybe' and when do you use 'perhaps?' " It was a question by Spanish speakers trying to figure out English.

    Mauricio_as_knight_ellen_perlmanI must have been emerging from nap time because I decided I had something to add. "Just use 'maybe,' " I said. " 'Perhaps' is kind of formal. But either one would work."

    That's how Mauricio, Paola and I struck up a friendship. They were embarking on a grand tour of Europe.  His English was pretty good because he had spent time working at a ski resort in Colorado. Hers was more elementary.

    That was fun for me because it gave me an excuse to use my Spanish. But if I got stuck on a word or phrase, Mauricio could translate in both directions, depending whether he needed to help me or his sister understand each other.


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  • Do not, I repeat, do not go to a couples resort alone. Like I did.

    What could be worse than being the one and only single person at an "intimate couples retreat" in the Poconos? Especially one that promotes itself like this:

    "Looking for a lovers’ paradise for your honeymoon or romantic getaway? Look no further than our Cove Haven Resort."

    I was that single person. At a resort with heart-shaped tubs and two-story tall champagne-glass Jacuzzis. Along with dozens of honeymooning couples. And others celebrating anniversaries. Champagne_glass_tub

    The answer to the opening question is this: along with getting a cavity filled without novocaine, slipping on ice and cracking my head open, and suffering with a migraine for eternity, I actually could easily name hundreds more things that could be worse. Probably thousands.

    You know why? Because I had plenty of giggles. Read the story for more about flying solo at a couples resort.

    Am I recommending this? ABSOLUTELY NOT. I was there as a professional. (As in professional travel writer). Do not, I repeat, DO NOT try this at home. Or away. I was there as an observer. I had a reason to go.

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  • Big-name newspapers around the world becoming aware of solo travelers

    Way_to_go_ellen_perlman_2
    The Washington Post devoted an entire travel section to how to "travel wisely." It was directed at a Washington audience, naturally. But even if you’re not from the local area, the info on "specialty" travel could be of great value. 

    The "specialties" range from single/solo to volunteer to African American to gay and lesbian. Any of those categories could offer opportunities for solo travel. As could a section on traveling with pets.

    The paper provided info on organizations and travel agents and listed Web sites and phone numbers.

    The New York Daily News ran a story Saturday on the topic of solo travel. For the record, I don’t much care for the term
    "solo-cation." But let
    the tour operators call it whatever they want as long as they’re passing out deals.

    Several of the deals are pricey, but the article offered a nice variety of trips, from cruises to hiking to beach vacations.

    Just a few days ago, the Times of London also ran a story on "holidays for single travellers." Which in American English is "vacations for single travelers." Gotta love that British English.

    The paper provided a long list of travel companies. I’m thinking it could be fun to be the only American on a trip for a change.

    That’s all for now. Cheerio until next time.

    Photo: Ellen Perlman. The Washington Post Travel Section front page.

  • Valentine’s Day travel deals for solos. Is that legal?

    Chocolate_heart_lollipops_ellen_per
    Ever study the faces of men lined up on Valentine’s Day to buy, last-minute of course, exorbitantly priced flowers or chocolate? Men suffer around Valentine’s Day.     You KNOW they do.

    For the longest time, the marketing folks aimed their PR guns solely at couples. Buy roses. Buy chocolate. Buy fuzzy pink bears. Buy, buy, buy.

    Heart_wrapping_paper_ellen_perlma_3Now, it seems, the marketing people have bonked their heads together and come up with this: Enticing singles to "celebrate" Valentine’s Day alone. Or with platonic friends. My first inkling of this came from the Cleveland paper’s travel blog.Chocolate_chocolate_ellen_perlman

    Heart_wrapping_paper_ellen_perlma_3Wait a minute. Valentine’s Day without a Valentine? Isn’t that like Mardi Gras without the booze, beads or parade? What’s the point? Single people don’t actually qualify for Valentine’s Day. You know what I’m saying?

    Heart_wrapping_paper_ellen_perlma_3Same way they don’t qualify for couples therapy on their own.
    Same way most don’t qualify for Secretaries Day. Or Grandmother’s Day.

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