Boldly Go Solo

How to set out solo, but not travel alone: Trips, tips and ideas for the active traveler.

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  • Travel companies need to solve the single supplement problem

    "Boy, did you ever hit a sore spot with me."

    That was the comment from a woman named Martha Miller who was responding to my story on single supplements, published recently in the Dallas Morning News. (and also here, if that link's expired)

    Her anger is directed at the tour operators I wrote about. It's misplaced. But it gave me an idea. About how travel companies could eliminate the traditional single supplement and take the heat off themselves. I'll get to that in a minute. But first, Miller's peeves.

    You know how some tour companies think they're offering a service matching solo guests up so they can avoid the single supplement? Doesn't sit real well with Miller. Living quarters are intimate, she says. A place where you bathe, sleep, change clothes and take care of "hygiene issues."

    Sharing with a stranger? "That simply boggles my mind! I'm not a 12-year-old girl going off to Scout Camp, for God's sake!" The single supplement is "astoundingly insulting" and "blatant discrimation."

    Miller, 48, enjoys traveling on her own, so she's paid the single supplement many times. So obviously she can afford it. But she begins these trips with a sense of annoyance, and a feeling that she is being "blatantly" robbed. "With the robber smiling straight in my face while doing the robbing!!"

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  • Behind closed doors, with families in Colombia, Finland or possibly Romania.

    Budapestnight100by_uzo19_3
    I wish it were me going to a wedding somewhere outside Budapest. Yeah, okay, that sounds strange. But I recently met Hayden, a Servas member who lets visitors from other countries stay at his house in Washington, D.C.

    The relationships he forms turn into wedding invitations and vacation stays in places that might not be at the top of the greatest hits lists that travel magazines promote. But they’re amazing places for him because he has friends there. 

    His two favorite countries are Hungary and Romania. A lot of that has to do with the people he hosted at his home, when they were on their vacations. And what led to the Hungarian wedding invitation.

    I met Hayden because I’ve decided to join Servas. Unlike couchsurfing.com, which I wrote
    about in February, Servas requires letters of recommendation and an
    interview before you show up at someone’s house. Travelers must be
    interviewed by a Servas member as part of the application process.

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  • Booking a travel companion before booking a trip

    No matter how many times they are told about the benefits of solo travel some people simply are not going to set out alone. For them, I offer the Web sites below. These sites promise to find solo vacationers a travel partner. In alphabetical order:Nz_first_set_032

    CuteTravelMate.com promises to find you friends, singles or travel companions with similar interests. (It seems to me those could all be one and the same.) Then you can share the fun and the expenses. But anything named "CuteTravelMate.com", I’m sorry, ain’t about finding "friends," to travel with. Because honestly? "Cute" is seldom one of my criteria for a good travel companion. "Doesn’t snore?" Better…

    Just Us Girls is a travel-matching service for women over 40. It offers to "individually" match you with a "like-minded travel partner for travel, adventure and friendship."

    Mango2ellen_perlman
    Mango Tree was founded by a guy named Ian, from Botswana. It’s headquartered in London but members come from all over. The site is "dedicated to turning your dream adventures into reality – whether by
    helping you find new travel companions, providing helpful tips and
    advice or simply giving you the inspiration to go somewhere new."

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  • Horseback riding in the Masai Mara: a trip to remember, if you can afford it

    800pxelephant_masai_marawhit_welles
    Riding horses across the Masai Mara, a large reserve park in Southwestern Kenya, is something I’d love to do. Paying $5,675 plus $875 for the single supplement is something I really don’t want to do. And won’t.

    In this case, even if I were spared the single supplement, I wouldn’t shell out close to $6,000 for an eight-day vacation. But it is fun to dream about. For those who have the bucks, Cross Country International, the company that offers it, promotes itself to single travelers:

    "Many
    of our customers travel alone. Many of our riders are single. This is a
    great way to meet other people and just be yourself."

    (They seem to have left off the "well-to-do" between "meet other" and "people.")800pxgiraffes_in_masai_marapaul_man

    I’ve never been to Africa. It would be amazing to go horseback riding and visit a wild animal reserve and meet with the local Masai at Acacia Camp, a game-viewing area.

    But some things simply are out of reach. For now. (Who says a bag packed with $1,000 bills couldn’t fall on my head tomorrow?)

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  • Cape May, NJ, historic district, free for the solo traveler…and others

    You don’t often get to barter labor for lodgings. Those "I Love Lucy" episodes where you have to wash dishes if you don’t have enough money to pay for dinner? Seldom happens.Chalfonte_hotel_2

    But at the historic Chalfonte Hotel in Cape May, New Jersey, you really can stay free. And get your meals free. In exchange for doing a little, shall we say, "housework." We not talking dusting and vacuuming. We’re talking painting, scraping, landscaping, cooking and laundry.

    Each year, the 132-year-old hotel invites volunteers to help open the National Historic Landmark for summer and shut it down for winter. So far, people from 27 states have showed up for the weekends, offering 10 hours of labor in exchange for some good old Southern cooking and a room by the shore.

    And a chance to visit a lovely, historic town full of
    Victorian-style, or "gingerbread" houses. The pretty downtown area is filled
    with little shops, cafes, nice restaurants and taffy and fudge stores.

    The beach offers skeeball addicts a small arcade. And
    you’ll have miles of white sandy beaches to wander. If you’re the
    gambling type, Atlantic City
    is about 40 minutes away. So if you can’t find someone to go to Cape
    May with, vacation alone. Comfortably. You have people to eat dinner
    with and time to sightsee.

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  • Jamming solo off the Maine coast

    Sometime during my early 20’s, my adventurous father treated me to a trip on a windjammer cruise off the coast of Long Island, in New York.

    In those days, I wasn’t traveling on my own. But I could see how easy it would have been to sail alone on a small boat like that and fit right in, no matter who else was on board.

    Mistresss
    Everyone pretty much does everything together. Sit up on deck. Eat below at a large table. Jump into the water when the boat anchors. It’s a life of ease…(except for the captain and the crew, of course.) Although you’re welcome to offer to help. Nah, I think I’ll just sit still and watch the sun glisten on the water.

    It appears the most active set of windjammers sails off the coast of Maine. A company called Windjammer Barefoot Cruises used to ply the Atlantic Ocean but they seem to be out of business. However, Maine is home to a large fleet of these traditional sailing ships.

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  • The Seaweed Lady welcomes solo travelers and others to her ocean garden on Vancouver Island, Canada

    The_seaweed_lady_with_bull_kelpelle
    When I think about seaweed…and no, I don’t think about it all that often…I think about that gross green stuff that wraps around your legs in the ocean. When "The Seaweed Lady" thinks about seaweed, she thinks about an ocean garden full of 700 species of a beautiful plant in varying colors.

    I traveled solo to visit Diane Bernard in Whiffen Spit, near the town of Sooke, British Columbia. She took me wading out into the Strait of Juan de Fuca off the West coast of Vancouver Island. In gum boots. What Americans call rubber boots. What the British call Wellington boots, or wellies.Seethrough_seaweedellen_perlman

    About 12 herons live in the ‘hood. And at least one aggressive eagle who dives down, zeroing in on the otters and yanking the fish right out of their mouths. When we waded in, she kept her voice down. She didn’t want to bother the heron on a nearby rock. It was nesting time for the grand birds.

    The Seaweed Lady knows tons, not only about seaweed but about the wildlife and the mountains around her ocean. And she’s good at dispelling myths about the often-maligned plant.

    Continue reading after video…

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  • Good places for dining solo in London

    A three-month-old blog I came across today has a post on London restaurants good for solo diners. I can’t vouch personally for the choices but the descriptions indicate the blogger gets what solo travelers are looking for.

    For instance, one restaurant offers reservations for a seat at the bar, a place where many solo travelers feel more comfortable than at a table for one. Another offers large communal dining tables. Yet another offers "quick and convenient" eating. See for yourself.

  • A Spa for the masses; welcoming for solo travelers

    A lot of people go to spas for massage and relaxation. I traveled solo to Deerfield Spa in Pennsylvania a few years back for just that. But also to get motivated to shed a few pounds.

    Unlike the stylish, modern-looking, expensive spas, this one is pretty basic. It was also close to home, saving me travel costs.

    Deerfield Spa is housed in, well, a house. The workout room, where we did yoga and belly dancing – yup, belly dancing – was in a separate building across a gravelly walk. (For the record, belly dancing cannot be learned in an hour. Not even close.)

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  • Parents revel in becoming single, temporarily

    "Don’t ruin a perfectly good holiday by taking your partner."

    That’s the headline of a story in yesterday’s edition of The Independent, a British newspaper. The point is that many married people are heading out on vacation solo. And, loving it.

    One person appreciated taking a break from "my usual boring, harassed, working-parent persona." When  parents travel without partners, there’s no one to make faces at them if they say or do the wrong thing. And there is no one to jump the gun with the punchline of the story they’re in the middle of telling.

    The writer called married people who set off alone, "temporary singletons." 

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