Boldly Go Solo

How to set out solo, but not travel alone: Trips, tips and ideas for the active traveler.

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  • Solo traveler finds friends in the Caribbean while kayaking and glass blowing. Nice!


    Beach fun rgb-1 Ever been to the U.S. Virgin Islands? Wanted to go but didn't want to go alone because going alone is scary? Well, my friend Diane, another travel writer, passed along this testimonial from a 50-year-old male guest at Maho Bay Camps, an eco-resort on St. John.

    "I went to Maho Bay alone in November," he wrote. "I enjoyed my stay and found that meeting people, although not my forte, was not hard to do. Dinner time at the pavilion is a good place to sit next to someone and chat."

    So were the glass-making demonstrations and the kayaking lessons, he added. 

    AND…Maho Bay Camps offers discounts on the room rates for solo travelers from now through December 14! Hallelujah. Instead of $80 a night, it's $60. They're actually "tent cottages" with private balconies and shared bathrooms and showers. Hence the low rate.

    And, once you're at a place like that, you don't walk away from the kayaking, never to see the person you met again. You run into them and then you're likely to smile and say hello, or hang out with them again somewhere. Especially if they came alone too.Girl walking maho beach-1

    The resort offers an 80-degree aqua ocean, reefs and colorful fish for snorkelers and a white-sand beach.

    A 40-year-old woman who went alone described Maho as an "adult summer camp," with plenty of people around. Now THAT'S my kind of place! I'm not a beach bum in a lounge chair with a book in my hand, looking for a tan. I'm a doer! Especially if it's trying something I haven't done before. Like glass blowing.

    Photos: Courtesy of Maho Bay Camps and Estate Concordia Preserve

  • Keeping flight costs down while searching online

    Airport departures-Ellen Perlman Travel Guru Chris Elliott recently wrote a piece about the rumor that airlines plant cookies on your computer to track your activities on their site, so they can "bait and switch" on fare prices.

    This news, which I've heard before, comes just as I'm trying to price a flight to Atlanta for June. I've already looked at some major sites, such as Kayak, Expedia and Farespotter, so they "know," according to this theory, that I'm interested in going to Atlanta.

    They might show me cheap fares until I'm ready to buy and then when I actually choose to book, I might get a message that that fare is no longer available. According to the theory.

    Since I've suspected this does indeed happen, I've decided to try to fight back.

    On firefox, I went into tools>options>privacy and found that I could tell my computer to not allow cookies for certain sites. Guess whose sites I typed in? Guess what happened? The site won't work without cookies! (Sorry if this is a bit advanced technology wise for some of you.)

    So I clicked a different option that says, "allow for session." Now, folks, I have NO idea whether this will, in general, change how the pricing works.

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  • Making good friends while traveling solo only to have to figure out how to say good-bye


    Okarito, New Zealand It's hard to leave good friends you've made while traveling.

    People
    who haven't experienced solo travel don't realize how tight the bonds
    can be when you click with someone abroad, or on the road. How can you
    walk away from someone you've so enjoyed being with, knowing you might
    never see him or her again? Or at least not for a long time?

    This theme has come up several times in the past few weeks. 

    One
    insightful post by a woman who is backpacking solo in China writes,
    "The question isn't, 'Am I lonely?' It's something along the lines of,
    "Can I handle making good friends and leaving them, over and over
    again?"    New Zealand friends-Ellen Perlman

    The repeated goodbyes make her sad. But, she realizes, "I could mope around and mourn the loss of a stable support group, or I
    can relish the prospect of meeting more interesting people in a shorter
    time period than I ever will again in my life."

    Funny, a friend of mine, Irene, who wrote the book, "Best Friends Forever," recently asked me to answer a question that came in on her site, "The Friendship Blog."
    A woman asked for advice on how to stay long-distance friends with
    someone you met while away and really enjoyed traveling with.

    The Q & A appeared on Huffington Post, as well as on Psychology Today, as well as on The Friendship Blog.
    (Irene is prolific and connected!) You can find the "answer" on any one
    of those sites. The relationship, obviously, will have to change when
    you're no longer in the same city…or country.

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  • Antiquing for solo travelers in New Oxford, Pennsylvania

    IMG_1074-Chestnut Hall B and B, PA-Ellen PerlmanIf you're an antiques freak, I highly recommend a trip to New Oxford, Pennsylvania, to get your fill of Victorian, Civil-War era and other antique furnishings, toys and kitchenware.

    I don't see it as an ideal place to travel solo if you don't love antiques because it's not exactly a hoppin' town, but for a couple of days it would be absolutely fine as a place to relax too.

    New Oxford is a one-horse town in rural Pennsylvania that, as I said, doesn't have the bustle of an urban center. However, considering you could spend HOURS perusing goods from hundreds of dealers you would be quite the busy shopper/browser.IMG_1001-Mickey Mouse book

    I went with a friend because I'm writing a story for The Washington Post on learning to like, or at least understand, antiques. So I took along a friend who has furnished her house in solid-wood oak pieces, green Depression glass and Watt pottery. (If you don't know what these are you're in the same boat that I started out in. I, at least, have begun to learn how to paddle.)

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  • Vacationers packing light and avoiding fees

    I love how travel marketers will find the bright side in any bit of rotten news, so long as it is a way to promote their clients.

    Recently, shockingly and amazingly, Spirit Airlines announced it would charge for overhead luggage now, as well as checked bags. By the time you pay for luggage in the overhead and stowed below, why not just buy a new car and shove the stuff in the trunk? For free.

    (In a related "news" item, the satirical website, the onion, announced that "cash-strapped American Airlines announced a new series of fees this
    week that will apply to all customers not currently flying, scheduled
    to fly, or even thinking about flying aboard the commercial carrier."**)

    The way things are going, it's almost believable!

    Anyway, to get back to the oh-so-clever marketers, I was amused to see that the Vacation Rental Managers Association offers this advice. And I paraphrase:

    Pack even less than you tried to cram into your suitcases when you didn't want to pay for checked luggage because villa and condo rentals often come with washers and dryers. So how much do you have to bring in the way of clean clothes really? 

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  • Solo and loving it at Disney World

    399px-Minnie_Mouse Are you a fan of Disney World but think it's someplace you simply can't go alone? Why?

    Gray Cargill at SoloFriendly.com offers 10 reasons for traveling to Disney World alone. And loving it. For instance, how great is it to be able to slip into the Single Rider line and fill one-seat spots, bypassing the sometimes 45-minute or longer waits to get on a ride?

    Or, say you want to go one a ride over and over? Or don't want to go on any rides at all one day? Who's to argue with you?

    And speaking of arguing, you know how you often see families at amusement parks arguing or irritated with one another. So many reasons that can happen. But not when you're alone. 450px-Cultural_appropriation_mickey

    I'm not a big enough fan of Disney to make it my vacation but I have been there several times. With family. With friends. And alone, either because I had work in the area or because Disney actually WAS my work. I once wrote a story about the park for a publication I used to work for.

    I enjoyed each way of visiting Disney but remember why I liked going alone. It was that ability to make quick decisions and zig zag my way through without getting approval from anyone. "Hey, mind if I stop in the gift shop, even though it's the 17th one and they all have the same stuff and you're really sick of the shops?"

    I never once uttered anything LIKE that sentence when I went alone.

    Once, when I was with family and friends, I was all excited to go on the Matterhorn ride, but there was a (not-to-be-named) person who chickened out at the last minute. So I turned away too. It was okay. I'm an adult. I can take it. But if I'd been alone, I'd have been zooming up those inclines and listening to the screams around me. Just like when I was a kid.

    In retrospect, that family member might have done me a favor. (You know who you are, but I'M not going to out you.) Rollercoasters? They don't sit so well with me anymore, now that I'm all grown up. Sadly. Very sadly. They were one of my favorite things as a kid.

    So if you're a Disney fan but don't think it's "right" to go to a family place like that by your lonesome, read Gray's post. It may give you the encouragement you need to indulge the kid in you. Even without any kids along.

    Photos:

    1. Jeff Christiansen

    2. Jonathan McIntosh

  • Solo hiking along the Blue Ridge and the Appalachian Trail

    Sky Meadows, Virginia-Ellen Perlman While many people spent Easter Sunday at church, 14 of us spent it in nature's cathedral, hiking seven miles in Sky Meadows State Park, on the eastern side of the Blue Ridge Mountains. While the cherry blossoms are now past peak, the trees in Delaplane, Virginia, are just beginning to bud.

    Many people may not realize that while the U.S. has some grand and well-known national parks, states also maintain a system of beautiful parks. Sky meadows is less than an hour from downtown D.C. In "the country."

    Once in the parking lot, we were greeted by the sounds of a cow lowing and, later, the smell of, well, cows. As the state park brochure says, "Generations of farming these hills makes for an incredible blend of pasture and woodlands."Paris, VA-Ellen Perlman

    The Sierra Club scheduled this hike three months ago and our leader got extremely lucky in that the weather was just about perfect. A light breeze and temperatures somewhere in the 70's.

    As
    you might imagine, these local hikes are perfect for solo travelers.
    People bond quickly. In fact, 12 of the 14 hikers who joined the group
    came alone.

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  • Japanese cherry trees and 80-degree weather provide a warm welcome to the DC area

    Cherry blossoms-Ellen Perlman The paths are lined with cherry trees. Whitish-pink petals rain down from the canopy of trees above like a Technicolor summer storm. Spring at the tidal basin in Washington, D.C.?

    No, spring a little farther north, in the Kenwood area of Maryland. Not quite a dirty little secret, but certainly not known by a lot of tourists. Yet, it's a much easier place to bask in the glory of the famous Japanese cherries. And certainly an easier place to park.

    True, there are no paddle boats to rent and no way to frame a photograph of the Washington Monument or the Jefferson Memorial through the blossoms. But so very much easier to stroll around. House with cherry trees, Kenwood, MD-Ellen Perlman

    The Tidal Basin this time of year is clogged with people. The sidewalks are narrow and the baby strollers have right of way. Maryland not only is more peaceful but there seem to be more trees. And while you're at it, you can gawk at the multi-million dollar homes and pick your favorites. Tudor? Modern? Stone?

    Yes, you must see the blossoms at the tidal basin as a visitor to D.C. But if you've already done so, here's a new place to gawk. No car? Both spots are accessible to solo travelers by public transportation. Kenwood requires a Metro ride and a bus. The Tidal Basin, a Metro and a longish walk.

    Today, just past peak, people had their cameras out, trying to capture the fleeting beauty. If you're anywhere in the area, hurry, hurry. Green leaves are poking up here and there, meaning the blossoms are already on their way out. If you're not, make a plan to visit next year.Kenwood, MD, street with cherry trees-Ellen Perlman

    Photos: Ellen Perlman. Kenwood, MD.

  • Solo travelers need a sense of humor and an iron stomach

    In February I offered some reader stories of mangled language attempts and misunderstandings while traveling in foreign countries. Here's another, from Gayle who has a fun food website called BeenThereAteThat.

    Gayle has traveled the world and tells this story about her stay in Tashkent, Uzbekistan:

    Looming over me was a blur of aquamarine eye shadow, crimson blusher and frosted orange lipstick, topped by a head of henna-red hair that would make a mad scientist jealous. Zoya ran a state-owned cosmetics factory, and no doubt, was also one of its best customers. I was her house guest for a week-long homestay during my visit to Tashkent, Uzbekistan. But at that moment, I felt more like her hostage.

     She had plunked a plate down in front of me with some slices of lean, medium-rare meat. She didn't know a word of English – and she didn't need to. I could read her thoughts like a native speaker. "You vill find dis to be de most tantalizing and delightful meal you haff ever eaten, and I vill stare at you until I know eet ees trrrrrue!"

    I picked up my knife and fork, then sawed off a bite. What is this stuff? I wondered. Not a filet, not a tenderloin. It didn't look quite like anything I'd ever eaten before. The slices were neat little ovals, rosy in the center, fading to gray at the edge. Not a bit of fat. Despite my dread, it tasted good.

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  • Best cruises for solo travelers

    I'll leave the details about the best ships for solo travel, to the folks at Suite101.com. I'm not a "cruiser," as people in the biz call travelers who board ships and sail off for vacation.

    But Suite101 provides here a list of companies that offer single cabins with no single supplement.

    They say the down side is a very small room. But people don't really go on cruises for the luxury rooms do they? They go for the never-ending food, the deck chairs, the activities and visits to various islands and ports. Is this not so?